And she will be loved...

I can't believe it's been nearly 11 weeks since our sweet little Ava was finally placed in our arms.  The weeks leading up to her eviction were charged with great anticipation and longing on my part.  Derrick was in the midst of his busiest season at work and we actually willed her not to come at all early because he was gone until bedtime each night and sometimes was feared too far away geographically to make it home in time.  I did not particularly like the idea of being in labor and having to drive kids around and then myself to the hospital as I assumed she would come fast and furious.  She certainly showed me!  I had started leave on September 8th and was so much more relaxed when I didn't have to get up and out the door by 3:40 every morning.  I was still not sleeping much being 39+ weeks pregnant but my other fear of having my water break in a nursing home was put to rest! I had been told from my 37 week appt on that I wouldn't make it through the weekend.  I was dilated to 2 cm right away and then moved to 4 cm by 37 weeks which was a Friday.  I laughed when she told me that and then overthought every single twitch my abdomen made.  I was actually having some braxton hicks this time.  I would wake up and think it's time but only to wake up much later and realize I had fallen asleep and that it wasn't time, oh well, I was able to get more sleep!  Derrick was so proud of her when she was still hanging on in there by the night of the 11th.  Having been due on the 12th I thought it only logical to go to the first PTO meeting at 7:00 pm on the 11th.  I sat there for just over an hour listening intently but measuring every move she made, trying to decide what I would do if my water broke in front of the principal.  She never slowed down in utero.  She was my most active baby.  On the 12th her last piece of room art arrived so I thought again, anyday now little one.  The 13th I woke up anxious.  We sat around just waiting all day long, the kids were so bored so we headed to do some shopping and then thought spicy mexican would do the trick.  I ate more than I had been able to eat in a long time and soon after there were some definite signs that we were having a baby so my parents headed over to get the kids and we walked.  It was 9:00 and dark out but we put headlamps on and we walked and walked and walked.  The next morning I woke up thoroughly disappointed but still determined so I was out of bed before the sun came up and I walked some more, this time out in the field thinking some good hiking and sweat will persuade her.

It didn't, so we ate dinner at my parents house and brought our kids back home to start another new week.  Alyssa and I headed up to school on Monday to eat lunch with our kindergartener

and then Tuesday came and then Wednesday and then I was calling my midwife wondering how much longer they were going to let me go.

Thursday we went to a friends house with my bags packed in the truck and then did some shopping just waiting for the call back from the midwives.  She finally called me back that evening and had already scheduled us to be admitted Friday at 11:00.  I was so excited!  I didn't sleep much at all that night just willing her to stay put because we had a schedule all worked out for the big kids over the weekend.  She listened again and we got Riley on the bus, dropped Alyssa off at school, went to eat at IHOP, which oddly enough we had only been to once before but they had me at bacon and cheese stuffed french toast and they were close to Joanns.  We needed an emergency princess crown after an unfortunate dog incident with Alyssa and we thought it would be nice to get it beforehand and give one to both our girls, hence the proximity to Joanns.  We are always early, so we checked in at 10:40 and waited.  We waited and waited and waited.  For the IV bags to come up from pharmacy, for the nurse to then start my IV, for the antibiotics to go through ((and they have to go in slowly because otherwise they sting)(I was strep B+)) and then for my water to be broken.  They kept asking me if I was having contractions yet and I continued to say no, like did they not understand that I was being induced, it was not happening on it's own and it still wasn't but even so I walked around for a good hour just willing it all to start once more! Finally she broke my water at 3:30 and I kept walking and reading until the monitors stopped working properly and I had to stay put in my room.  I was thinking that labor and contractions were a piece of cake but finally, finally I could feel pain and I was excited until I had contraction after contraction with only a 20 second break inbetween each one, literally, 20 seconds with the average contraction lasting about 3 solid minutes.  It was unreal.  By far the worst labor pains I have had so by 6:30 I asked to be checked again at 7:00.  At 7:00 I was still at a 4!  A stupid 4!  So I opted for the epidural.  The whole pregnancy I thought I should just go about labor naturally.  I thought if this is my last, I should feel everything and cherish every single pain.  Needless to say, that was also stupid and after literally squeezing the life out of Derrick's hands for 2 hours I almost kissed the anesthesiologist but I was in too much pain to move.  He was walking out of the room by 7:45 and I should have been more comfortable but I wasn't.  I was having the worst pressure I have ever felt.  I gave it a few more minutes and thought he didn't place it right but turns out, boom, she was ready to come.  Just like that.  My midwife came back and we bragged about how Alyssa was out in 2 pushes so she would surely be able to make it to the other room that was just about ready.  Again, baby girl showed me.  I pushed for 19 minutes which felt like an eternity.  She was literally stuck, I could feel her almost push out and then just be stuck.  She went back and forth, back and forth and then I asked my midwife and Derrick if she was a giant and they both just looked at me and said nothing.  I was sure she was going to be 10+ lbs and that's why she was stuck but finally, finally, oh sweet finally, she was out.  She had the cord wrapped around her neck twice and her hands were also wrapped up by her cheeks so that's why she was stuck.  Every U/S we had, she always had her hands up by her cheeks so I should have known better.  They unwrapped her tiny self and laid her right on me.  Just like her brother, she hardly cried.  She stared up at Daddy and was so calm.

Everyone rushed out of the room to help another laboring mother so it was quiet and calm and perfect.  She was cleaned up and weighed in at 7 lbs 4 ozs, 20 inches long.  Our tiniest baby by a few ounces.  My parents happened to be at a wedding in Minnetonka so they headed over around 10:00 to meet our Ava.  She was either Madeline or Ava or possibly Mallory but in the end Ava fit her best.  She got her middle name from the kids.  Whenever someone asked them what the babies name should be is was always, Rosie.  I don't know where they got that from but after 9 months of them wanting a Rosie, we had to incorporate it somehow so she became Ava Rose.  Derrick went home around 11:00, my brother stayed until she had her first bath and then headed home around midnight and then it was just us.  I think my most precious, sacred moments are the moments when it's just me and my new baby.  I held her, and prayed over her, whispering love and hopes over her.

 I cry now just reliving those moments where all of the fears, excitement, anticipation of 9 months and love finally culminate and spill out onto this tiny human.  I stayed in my huge labor room all night and woke up the next morning in awe that this was real.

Derrick brought Riley and Alyssa up to meet her along with Nana Kathy and we had so much fun watching the love they had stored up for her spill out all over the place.

They love her so well.  We had a full day of visitors after the ALS walk and finally it was just Ava and I again.  We were moved to a smaller, cozy room with a much more comfortable bed and I just couldn't take my eyes off of her.  Daddy called to say the big kids missed her and wanted to say goodnight to her and after that we rocked in the chair together.  They took her for her 24 hour check up and I cried.  I missed her already and I was clearly hormonal.  She returned to me bloody and pissed.

The heelstick and shot put her over the edge and she literally cried all night long.  I was so tired by about 7:00 a.m. that I changed her diaper while she was laying on me and she peed all over me.  It was a great excuse to get out of the hospital gown and into real clothes.  It felt good.  So weird, to be all of a sudden without a belly and into real clothes, real clothes being sweatpants and an oversized shirt but you know.  I was almost ready to leave the hospital but wasn't in a hurry.  Those quiet moments are precious and the food was so good.  I could have stayed for a few more days but we headed home and made a stop at Broadway for pizza to go on the way home.  The next weeks were a blur.  One big, happy, satisfied blur.  We stayed busy.  She from day one, slept in her crib usually around 10:00 pm and would get up every few hours but went right back to sleep until 7:00 or so in the morning.

I was geared up for late, long nights but they never came.  She never cried, she was/is a fantastic nurser, she smiled at 1 week old, not a fake gas smile, but a- look- right- us and genuinely smile, smile.  She didn't like a nuk and we worked hard to get her to take one.  She now likes them when she is tired but otherwise has no need for them.  She continued to go to sleep earlier and earlier and by November she was sleeping in 5 hour stretches.  I have been so well-rested these last 12 weeks.  I have never been more calm or felt like such a satisfied, pretty "good" Mom. It's by far been the easiest transition of child rearing we have had and there have been moments of "what were we thinking" but I can count those moments on one hand.  I cannot count how many moments of "this is how it was meant to be" have occurred.  It feels right, she had a place in our house and in our hearts long before we even knew there was room.  I am almost down to pre-pregnancy weight.  I have 10 lbs to go but I feel good this time.  I feel pretty normal and if I stayed at 140, I could be happy with that. I like my treadmill time though and if nothing else, it gives me a chance to watch Grey's and refresh for a quick 30 minutes.  I'm just going to keep running with this giant paragraph because I don't know where to split it up and I just don't care that much.  I have learned so much this last 12 weeks.  I started a Beth Moore study when she was just 3 weeks old and I thought to myself how stupid I was, carting a newborn back and forth, nursing her in the back of the room, hardly able to pay attention but now we are here with only 1 week left of study and she doesn't come with me anymore.  I have learned so much from Beth and the other ladies in my group and from my tiny Ava.  Life is so short, I learned that the hardest way last fall and it's been reinforced with how fast and furious time flies.  I have been marching to the drum of Phillipians 4:4-6 as I approach going back to work tomorrow.  My heart is tight.  I do not want to go back to overtired, out of patience Mom and Lindsey.  I so want to be what my kids deserve.  I am so scared that I will fall back into that pity party of 1.  Oh, my heart is so tight today.  The tears are ripe and just wanting a place to fall.  I am lucky enough to ease back into work, working just 9 days in December before going back to 24 hour weeks in January but still I am tight and raw today.  I will not sleep much tonight and I will wake up my Ava to nurse at 3:30 so she will sleep until I get home.  We will keep working on bottles and soon enough I will not be having to wake her up anymore.  I pray for sustenance and peace as I face these long days ahead, it's all a gift.  How great would it be if we celebrated everyday like it's a holiday, thankful for our gifts, spending time with family and friends and looking hopefully towards a bright future?  Thankfully for me (and you), love writes an incredible story that started on Christmas and ended on a cross.  I pray to live these long, hard, sleepless days ahead with that in mind.

Riley, Alyssa, Ava, I love you more than you could ever possibly imagine.  I love you past the moon and back.  I love you deep and wide.  I am your momma and I make so many mistakes but my love for you will never waiver.   And now I treadmill to get out those tears and sweat and hopefully do at least one productive thing with so far such a waste of a day.  Till next time.

Awaiting her arrival

I've been rather busy this 3rd time around and haven't documented much with the exception of a few belly shots via IG.  The busyness of having 2 active kids, a bigger house and much bigger yard have kept me going.  We have really enjoyed gardening this year and I am horrified at how bad the weeds have got since I can't comfortably bend down/over since hitting that 36 week mark.  We should have at least 3 watermelons though ready soon, how ironic since baby girl is now the size of a watermelon ;).

Last week I was ready to be done with work.  I was tired of getting up at the ungodly hour of 3:00.  This week I am content and enjoying a few days of playing catch up.  Today I have been up since 4:18, irony again.

16.5 weeks

Nesting is so great and I'm not sure why we can't go through a full year or two or more of enjoying that "nesting energy" when child rearing!?  My house has never been so clean and I'm almost obsessive at it  being clean currently.

Here comes the scatter brain of being uber pregnant and it being 5:34 a.m...

I can hardly comprehend that literally any day now we are having a third child.  The excitement of the 'any day' is palpable but the reality is that this is still unbelievable.  She has been a very easy pregnancy.  I have gained just about 30 lbs (probably in pure sugar) and been measuring small for most of this term.    She is probably my most active in-utero child and has only in the last few days started to slow down enough that you could almost call it a schedule!  The heartburn has been horrific at times to the point of me waking up and not being able to keep it down but instead puking for a hour or so.  This has been on and off the whole time but the last few weeks it's been 1-2 times a week.  I have been dilated to at least a 2 since my 36 week checkup.  Last Friday at 39 weeks I was up to a 4 with her sitting so low (+1 station) and being 80 % effaced.  I know that means nothing after walking around at a 4-5 with Lyssi who we eventually evicted.  But it's nice to know I'm nearly half way there and have done virtually nothing.

22.5 weeks

Virtually nothing is as follows.  The heartburn as listed above.  Cannot wait to not have acid reflux even when I wake up in the morning or after drinking some water!  ;)  The back pain of her sitting so low that only goes away when I immerse myself every.single.night in the tub with the jets full blast.  The constant bathroom breaks which seem so silly after literally tinkling a few drops.  Somewhat off topic, I remember vividly the first time I peed after each child and it was like heaven.  Wow, to go to the bathroom and actually make it worth the trip!  TMI,? oh well.  In the scheme of things, easy peasy as was with my other two except this time I feel completely, 100% satisfied that this is the end of child bearing.  I never felt that after Alyssa.  By the time she was around 2- I was questioning if I really wanted to do it all over again but I never felt the finality that I do now.  She will be the bookend of our family.

32+ weeks

I am so excited to see what she looks like.  I am so excited to see D and Riley surrounded by two little girls.  I am so excited but in no hurry.  This week has been all about adjusting without the tears.  Kindergarten was a doozy.  For me more so than anyone else.  I will say that it was the single hardest day so far of parenting ever for me.  The pain and sheer heartache I felt after leaving that school and sitting alone in my living room was awful.  Riley looked terrified when we found his teacher and class in the cafeteria that first day.  I was trying not to hyperventilate all the while D is telling me to try to not cry because if I do, Riley certainly would have.  They finally took off as a class to their room and when he disappeared behind that door I could not hold it in any longer.  I am crying now just remembering it.  We were one of just a handful of parents there and it was odd.  We didn't want to leave without saying goodbye so we waited for his class to emerge again for 9:20 breakfast and quick said our goodbyes.  It was just the saddest thing I have done.  Leaving him with utter strangers in a strange, huge building.  Thankfully we have so many neighbor kids there and a very special neighbor who sent me a voicemail in the early afternoon letting me know that she had checked up on Riley and that he was smiling and almost dancing down the hallways in line having fun.  She will never understand how much that meant to me!  Wednesday got better but I couldn't believe we had to do it all over again!  I only cried for a few minutes when I missed him.  Thursday was a pretty good day but I still cried a few quick tears at the fact that this was really happening.  Friday was relief.  I had strong urges to pick him up early and just come home to snuggle but we made it and sure enough he dropped his bag in the yard most days and ran next door to play cars.  He is doing awesome.  He loves his class and his teacher.  He has made friends but only remembers Jett and Chase by name.  On Wednesday his funny quote was, "I don't know how much longer I can keep going all day, everyday," to which we tried earnestly to explain that he has weekends off and many days off during the school year but dude, this is why we weren't in a hurry to grow you up!  Thursday I asked him what the favorite part of his day was and he replied, "I'll tell you what it wasn't.  One of the girls puked all over everything."  Ha, great, lice and puke the first week!  He really is enjoying school and we work on "homework" for 5 or so minutes every night just trying to get into a routine.  His homework this weekend was to remember his lunch number and it was a worry of ours but this kid surprised the heck out of me and actually has a fabulous memory!  It only took a mere minute or so and then he was off playing but able to recite it with the "enter" at the end for the rest of the weekend!  Proud, wow, seriously the pride was intense for a lunch number!  Monday, I got up around 8:00 and the surprise and happiness on his face that I could walk him to the bus stop was so cute.  I'm trying to embrace this step with joy and happiness and he's making it easier but it's too fresh to not think about how he was just a few years ago or even as my only baby before I have tears in my eyes again.  It really is just bittersweet.

36 weeks and the end of bike riding and weeding for me.

Speaking of this boy, he is going to be so much fun to watch as a big brother again.  It's going to be so different this time around now that he is 6 and Alyssa is 3.5.  They can dress themselves and are potty trained and so much more independent than when we brought Alyssa home.  He just started giggling when we told him it could be any day now.  A little nervous probably, very excited and very intrigued how this all will play out bodily wise.  :)  Haha, the questions he comes up with!

So, baby girl #2, we are ready for you late Thursday or anytime after!  We cannot wait to see your hair color and I am so ready to hold you outside of holding the bottom of my belly!  I plan on this being fast but since it's my last time I just look forward to the whole experience.  I also want to nail down a name for you but we are waiting til we see your tiny face.

39 weeks, 4 days.  Derrick said he can't remember me ever being this big.  It's lucky I agree and I love him!

Dear Riley, Part Deux

Everyone says it and everyone looks for it...where did the time go?

I remember distinctly marking the day the madness would begin-the last day school was in session in spring.  Ben our little neighbor was over and even though it was finally nice out, you asked if you could just come in and watch a little movie.  I obliged and marked the moment as the day the quiet would end.  In some ways the quiet did end.  Kids once again ruled the road.  You realized your best friend was home everyday and you never wanted to slow down for your mom or your tummy.  Every moment was spent asking if you could go play and trust me, it made my job somewhat easier but sometimes I just wanted to hoard you and remind you that we used to have all kinds of fun together too.  

You growing up on me has been a difficult change.  It's been fun to watch but looking back makes me miss it so.  I have slowly been replaced by friends and yes, you still need your mama but not like you did even a year ago.  It's good but it's change and change has never been particularly easy on me.  Before you had friends you had me and a tiny little Lu.  We walked to a different park every night and we explored ponds and trails as if it was a new adventure.  We spent every moment together and I (and Daddy) was your best friend.  The days were LONG, clearly the years were short.

I expect alot out of you, probably because you have always been such a good kid, a great listener, a caring soul, a respectful and thoughtful little boy.  You really have made parenting so very easy.  You have a special light and energy and we've seen it bloom and explode in epic proportions this last year.  You are social and creative and you like to be around people and engage.  You say "hi" to all the neighbors and you frequently ask if we can have people over.  You have moved over so Alyssa can scoot in right, I mean, right next to me.  You have relinquished the spot on my lap and given it over to her.  It was so gradual that I hardly even noticed it happening and now it's almost too late.  Between your growth spurt and my belly's you don't fit on my lap anymore.  And I regret that.  I miss that.  I understand it but...

In February we visited Twin Lakes together.  You listened very carefully as they explained and talked about sending your child before they are ready to go to kindergarten.  You thoughtfully told me afterwards, "I think I should take that extra year."  I laughed about it and explained that this was "your" year and that we didn't have a choice, next fall you had to start school.  The more I thought about your statement though the more sad I got.  It was really the end of your innocent, no pressures, no worries era.  It was the end of getting upset over spilled milk and worrying about if your friends were playing nicely and not teaching you naughty words.  It was watching you trying to figure out what being a friend was and then striving to fit and mold yourself into being that "friend".  It was everything I never wanted for you and still knew had to come to fruition. It's been a year of learning for both of us.  We have stretched out just a bit from the hovering parenting to the parents that sit at the edge of the yard and strain to hear anything we can pick up.  Mostly, we have said you have to stay in our yard or Aaron's and Ben's yard because honestly the hovering is just too comfortable to let go of just yet.

I'm just not at all ready for this next step.  I know in my heart it will be fine in just a few short weeks but the anticipation and numerous questions that pop into my head at all hours of the night have made it difficult to sleep.  I know you will like it and it breaks our hearts that you have some trepidation over tomorrow morning.  Dude, if you aren't a bit nervous, you are doing it wrong.  I was always a bit nervous and excited even when I was going into another year at the same tiny private school with pretty much the same 10-12 friends I had since 1st grade.  Life isn't easy and these baby steps into independence are necessary and good for growth but know without a doubt that I would keep you sheltered up all cozy and snug at 9101 168th Ave NW for much longer if I could.  I think it's easy to say that this is much harder on your Dad and me than it is you.

My sweet, mirror image of myself...we love you to the moon and back and we will always be there for you and be the softest landing you can find.  We will think of you non-stop in the next few days and probably much longer than that.  We will relish you getting of the bus and back into our house if only for a few minutes before you want to play the fall away.

Riley, we are so very proud of you.  Remember who you are becoming already, kind, gentle, creative, fun, energetic.  When life hurts you, share it with me, I will hurt with you.  Don't ever forget that you are never too big to sit on my lap.  You are the oldest, don't be pushed around.  You make good (mostly good for 6 ;)) decisions, don't let that waver.  And please, eat your lunch fast so I don't have to worry about your tummy rumbling all afternoon when you only have a mere 20 minutes to sit down and eat.  Seek out quiet students and be their friend.

In these last few weeks I have been on edge almost constantly.  The anxiety of Kindergarten has gotten to us all.  I had to slip into the shower last week because the tears kept running down my face and I didn't want the kids to notice.  I sobbed and sobbed and looked terrible when I finally got out.  I must look pathetic on a regular basis because they didn't notice ;).  Thank goodness I am not in this boat alone and that the texts come in at just the right time about how much this sucks and that we can always homeschool if any of us hates this transition too much!  You will see me cry and it's okay, tears aren't anything to be ashamed of.  It's mostly because I am so proud of you and have enjoyed so much of the last 6 years together.  It's also because I have some serious hormones going on and I can so clearly remember holding you for the first time as you looked up intently at Daddy right after you were delivered.  You hardly cried, you just stared and we stared.  I have had these songs stuck in my head for days and these are my honest wishes for you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4NS7gChzvk


"My Wish"  Rascal Flatts
I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,
If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

This is my wish
I hope you know somebody loves you
May all your dreams stay big

It's a...

Whew, it feels so surreal to be here at almost 21 weeks!  This pregnancy has just flown by, extremely easy and carefree in regards to the new baby.  I hadn't been at all anxious to know if it was a boy or a girl up until last week when I could hardly wait for this morning.  My heart and head have undergone a complete transformation and I switched from expecting/wanting a boy to wanting a sister bond for my girl.  I thought alot of my own sister and how lucky I am to have her and now her little Jax.  Jax is hers but I love him like he was my own because she's my little sister barely 2 years behind me.  I wanted a best friend for my daughter that was homegrown in love and loyalty.  I still had a small hunch it was a boy but I felt in my bones it probably wasn't going to be so.

We got all set up in the ultrasound room and the first picture that appeared was baby #3 spread eagle and I knew immediately that it was a girl!  She was letting us know loud and clear that she was indeed a "she" and not to mistake that!  Had we said we didn't want to know it would have been impossible to miss.  It was hilarious and I panicked for a sec thinking forward to the teenage years with 2 girls but after that we were so very excited!  We saw her give a big old yawn and then bring her tiny hand up to her face for comfort.  She was so cooperative with all the pictures except for the spine so I have to go back at my 28 week appt for one more ultrasound...bummer :).  Just watching her move around in there and stretching her tiny muscles was an absolute joy.  What a gift to just be still in awe and wonder.  Will she have blonde hair?  Brown hair?  Red?  HA!  We are so excited to see her and touch her and see who she resembles!

sorry for the terrible cell pic of a pic but since moving I have no idea what we did with the scanner!

A boy for Riley would have been great but they would have more than 6 years apart in age and Alyssa is in desperate need of more estrogen in the house with an all boy brother as her influence for the last 3 years!

I went up to the garage attic and rifled through Alyssa's newborn clothes the last few weeks and I desperately wanted to use those again.  Those soft pink sleepers and delicate dresses that my Lu graced for just a short time were needing to be worn again.  I think of our girls sharing a bedroom like my sister and I did and I dream of their budding friendship, dress-up dates and tea parties for two!

Following this appt I have been on cloud 9.  It feels so good to put a "face" to the baby rolling around in there and kicking me good and hard when my early alarm goes off.  She is the one that gets up with me and kicks me to keep me awake for those first very early hours.  She is the one that has slowly but surely put my heart on notice to come together and look forward to the future.  We just want to hold her so badly now and this pregnancy has finally gotten real for both of us.  She is our tiny miracle weighing in at 13 ozs currently.

I'm currently typing with 3 very loud boys playing guns and war behind me meanwhile my daughter is desperately trying to find a foothold with a princess dress on and bangles galore.  She is pleading to stay "alive" and trying to find anyone to pay attention to her femininity.  Poor girl, I cannot wait until Daddy gets home tonight so we can break the news.

Neither has asked me yet what we are having, they are too young, wrapped up in themselves to remember that today was the day.  I imagine Riley will be a little crushed but we talked about it at bedtime the last few nights and I think I have him prepared to be the little man of the house that will be the protector for two precious, pretty girls.

Our all boy starts baseball (coaches pitch) on Monday and our sweet girl starts dance in a few weeks.  This summer is going to fly by and I cannot wait!